Editorial
Last week I said 'shut up' and this week continues the ad hoc series.
Just keeping you mouth (or text,...) shut doesn't at all mean you are listening. There are a lot of people who shut up do so just to catch their breathe or to get another run at the target.
When you are in a conversation that seems lopsided it is best to just let them run out of things to say and move on. You can easily let it continue by–I will this and you won't believe me–just speaking, saying anything. If you are caught in one of those conversations, you will never get the last word. Just smile and be quite, walk away in a polite manner.
That brings up something we seem to have forgotten, being polite. This isn't straying away from the art of listening it is what helps us listen better and with understanding. Being polite is listening. It is listening to the other person trying to communicate something of themselves to us.
Listening requires more than just hearing words. Listening means understanding what is being said. I can hear someone speak to me but if they are speaking in a language I don't understand, I have no idea what they are trying to communicate to me. We must first understand the language they are speaking.
Language is the method by which we share thoughts, ideas and feelings. It is more than words it combines every element of our senses to fully share with another person. The more intimate or close we are to someone the more senses we use to share our feelings, thoughts or ideas. Listening requires us to interpret all those signals to understand the other person.
We may never completely understand the other person in full but the more we listen the better we become at understanding. The way guys and girls communicate is an ideal example. I can understand when a guy explains something and can get it accurately most of the time. I seem to never get what girls are saying and always miss the mark. (I think they just change their mind too much.) Case closed.
Culture, whether is be age, gender or race, plays a part in understanding what you are listening to. And, don't forget where or how they were brought up. Listening has to include background influences, both in speaking and listening. Know where they're coming from.
I said all this to try and understand what I am listening to and why others aren't listening. I am hearing a lot of people speaking of things for which they know not what they are saying. I mean, what they are saying just doesn't add up or make sense in a world of so much information. I think there is a breakdown in communication .
